1 00:00:04,300 --> 00:00:06,400 "AND THAT'S WHEN THE GREAT CHINESE WIZARD LEE 2 00:00:06,400 --> 00:00:08,300 "FIRST USED DRAGON SCALES TO BUILD 3 00:00:08,300 --> 00:00:11,567 "AN IMPENETRABLE BOX FOR SAFEGUARDING ONE'S WAND, 4 00:00:11,567 --> 00:00:13,100 "AND THEN IN THE 12th CENTURY, 5 00:00:13,100 --> 00:00:14,133 THERE WHERE 9 NATIVE AMERICAN"-- 6 00:00:14,133 --> 00:00:16,567 TIME! 7 00:00:16,567 --> 00:00:19,500 YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO KEEP YOUR ORAL REPORTS UNDER 45 MINUTES. 8 00:00:19,500 --> 00:00:20,967 OTHERWISE, YOU START LOSING PEOPLE. 9 00:00:20,967 --> 00:00:22,367 OK. ALEX, YOU'RE UP. 10 00:00:24,800 --> 00:00:27,567 ALEX. UH-HUH. OH, YEAH. 11 00:00:27,567 --> 00:00:28,834 YOUR REPORT ON CRYSTAL BALLS-- 12 00:00:28,834 --> 00:00:31,400 HISTORY, USAGE, AND MANUFACTURING. 13 00:00:31,400 --> 00:00:34,367 CRYSTAL BALLS-- USAGE AND MANUFACTURING. 14 00:00:34,367 --> 00:00:38,133 OH! I DID MINE ON HOW TO USE THE REALLY LITTLE ONES FOR EARRINGS. 15 00:00:38,133 --> 00:00:39,967 CUTE, HUH? 16 00:00:39,967 --> 00:00:42,200 END OF REPORT. 17 00:00:42,200 --> 00:00:43,800 TRY IT AGAIN TOMORROW. 18 00:00:43,800 --> 00:00:44,867 MAX, YOU'RE UP. 19 00:00:44,867 --> 00:00:47,033 OK. AHEM. 20 00:00:47,033 --> 00:00:49,967 "CAULDRONS: PROPER USE AND MAINTENANCE." 21 00:00:51,767 --> 00:00:53,900 HOW'D ALL THESE PEOPLE GET IN MY ROOM? 22 00:00:53,900 --> 00:00:56,567 HEY! UNCLE KELBO! 23 00:00:56,567 --> 00:00:58,233 HELLO, FUTURE VOTERS. 24 00:00:58,233 --> 00:01:01,000 HA HA HA! SORRY FOR DROPPING IN UNEXPECTEDLY. 25 00:01:01,000 --> 00:01:02,567 WANTED TO SEE MY FAVORITE NIECE AND NEPHEWS. 26 00:01:02,567 --> 00:01:05,467 KELBO, WHAT DID I SAY ABOUT POOFING IN WHEN YOU VISIT? 27 00:01:05,467 --> 00:01:07,667 OH, RIGHT, RIGHT, RIGHT. SETS OFF THE SMOKE ALARMS. 28 00:01:07,667 --> 00:01:09,033 [SMOKE ALARM BEEPING] 29 00:01:09,033 --> 00:01:10,600 SO WHAT ARE YOU GUYS UP TO? 30 00:01:10,600 --> 00:01:13,200 WE'RE DOING BORING ORAL REPORTS WITHOUT MAGIC. 31 00:01:13,200 --> 00:01:14,934 YOU KNOW YOU'RE WIZARDS, RIGHT? 32 00:01:14,934 --> 00:01:17,100 WELL, LOTS OF TIMES, DAD WANTS US TO STUDY MAGIC 33 00:01:17,100 --> 00:01:19,300 WITHOUT ACTUALLY USING MAGIC. 34 00:01:19,300 --> 00:01:22,000 WELL, THAT'S BECAUSE HE CAN'T DO MAGIC. 35 00:01:22,000 --> 00:01:23,600 YOU KNOW WHAT I SAY? 36 00:01:23,600 --> 00:01:25,033 THOSE WHO CAN'T TAKE HAMBURGER 37 00:01:25,033 --> 00:01:29,500 AND TURN IT INTO DELICIOUS FILET MIGNON TEACH. 38 00:01:29,500 --> 00:01:32,300 OK. FINE. I DIDN'T BECOME THE FAMILY WIZARD, 39 00:01:32,300 --> 00:01:36,400 BUT THE THINGS I CAN DO WITH PLAIN HAMBURGER WILL BLOW YOUR MIND. 40 00:01:36,400 --> 00:01:38,600 HE PUTS CHEESE IN THE MEAT. 41 00:01:38,600 --> 00:01:40,033 HEY. I'VE HAD MANY, MANY, MANY OF HIS 42 00:01:40,033 --> 00:01:41,500 INSIDE-OUT CHEESEBURGERS. 43 00:01:41,500 --> 00:01:43,834 TELL ME ABOUT IT. 44 00:01:43,834 --> 00:01:45,000 SO WHAT ARE YOU WORKING ON? 45 00:01:45,000 --> 00:01:46,400 WELL, I'M DOING A REPORT 46 00:01:46,400 --> 00:01:48,467 ON THE GREAT CHINESE WIZARD LEE. 47 00:01:48,467 --> 00:01:52,500 CHINESE WIZARD LEE? HE'S IN MY FAVE 5. 48 00:01:52,500 --> 00:01:54,200 BEEP BEEP BOOP BOOP BOOP BOOP BOOP. 49 00:01:54,200 --> 00:01:56,133 BEEP BEEP BOOP BOOP BOOP BOOP BOOP. 50 00:01:56,133 --> 00:02:02,500 BEEP BEEP BOOP BOOP BOOP BOOP BOOP BEEP. 51 00:02:02,500 --> 00:02:04,133 HE'LL COME HERE. HE'LL TEACH YOU ALL ABOUT HIS LIFE. 52 00:02:04,133 --> 00:02:05,600 HE'LL DO ANYTHING TO GET AWAY 53 00:02:05,600 --> 00:02:07,600 FROM HIS WITCH OF A WIFE, OK? 54 00:02:07,600 --> 00:02:11,000 BY THE WAY, HIS WIFE, SHE REALLY IS A WITCH. 55 00:02:11,000 --> 00:02:14,800 LEE, BABY! HOW'S THAT WIFE OF YOURS? 56 00:02:14,800 --> 00:02:16,200 [BEEP] 57 00:02:16,200 --> 00:02:18,867 LOOK. I WOULD APPRECIATE IT 58 00:02:18,867 --> 00:02:21,300 IF I COULD TEACH THEM MY WAY. 59 00:02:21,300 --> 00:02:22,834 YEAH, YOU'RE RIGHT. 60 00:02:22,834 --> 00:02:23,967 NO MORE DISTRACTIONS. 61 00:02:23,967 --> 00:02:25,000 THANK YOU. 62 00:02:25,000 --> 00:02:26,000 OH! I'VE GOT PRESENTS! 63 00:02:26,000 --> 00:02:27,300 OH! OOH! PRESENTS! 64 00:02:27,300 --> 00:02:30,567 JUSTIN, I'VE GOT YOU SOME OPERA GUM. 65 00:02:30,567 --> 00:02:32,400 AW, SWEET. WHAT'S IT DO? 66 00:02:32,400 --> 00:02:34,200 IT'S OPERA GUM. TRY SINGING. 67 00:02:35,200 --> 00:02:39,967 ♪ AHH ♪ 68 00:02:39,967 --> 00:02:41,600 I THINK I'LL SAVE THAT FOR THE TALENT SHOW. 69 00:02:41,600 --> 00:02:46,100 GREAT! MAX, FOR YOU, I'VE GOT... 70 00:02:46,100 --> 00:02:48,834 THE LEPRECHAUN ANSWER BLOWER. 71 00:02:48,834 --> 00:02:51,000 ASK IT A QUESTION, BLOW A BUBBLE, 72 00:02:51,000 --> 00:02:53,500 BUBBLE POPS, THERE'S YOUR ANSWER. 73 00:02:53,500 --> 00:02:54,767 GIVE IT A DRIVE. 74 00:02:54,767 --> 00:02:56,233 AWESOME! COME ON, BABY! 75 00:02:56,233 --> 00:02:58,900 WHAT ARE THE ANSWERS TO MY SOCIAL STUDIES TEST? 76 00:03:02,767 --> 00:03:04,400 YES OR NO QUESTIONS ONLY, 77 00:03:04,400 --> 00:03:07,600 BUT I LOVE THAT YOU THINK BIG! 78 00:03:07,600 --> 00:03:11,700 AND FOR MY FAVORITE NIECE, WHO I LOVE, 79 00:03:11,700 --> 00:03:14,800 I HAVE FOR YOU AN EMOTOSCOPE. 80 00:03:14,800 --> 00:03:16,200 OK. LOOK THROUGH IT. YOU'LL SEE HOW 81 00:03:16,200 --> 00:03:17,467 PEOPLE ARE REALLY FEELING. 82 00:03:17,467 --> 00:03:19,700 OH, COOL. I'VE ALWAYS WANTED ONE. 83 00:03:25,867 --> 00:03:27,367 WOW! EITHER YOU'RE REALLY EXCITED, 84 00:03:27,367 --> 00:03:29,233 OR YOUR UNDERWEAR'S ON TOO TIGHT. 85 00:03:34,100 --> 00:03:37,500 AND MAX HAS NO IDEA WHAT'S GOING ON. BIG SHOCKER. 86 00:03:42,500 --> 00:03:44,834 WOW! YOU'RE MAD INSIDE AND OUT. 87 00:03:44,834 --> 00:03:47,400 WELL, BECAUSE NO ONE WANTS TO FINISH THE WIZARD LESSON. 88 00:03:47,400 --> 00:03:51,000 HE'S RIGHT. WHO WANTS TO GO TO THE ZOO? 89 00:03:51,000 --> 00:03:52,600 THE ZOO? THE ZOO? 90 00:03:52,600 --> 00:03:54,100 LET ME REPHRASE THAT. 91 00:03:54,100 --> 00:03:55,700 WHO WANTS TO GO TO THE ZOO... 92 00:03:55,700 --> 00:03:57,600 AS A MONKEY? 93 00:03:57,600 --> 00:03:59,100 YOU'RE GONNA TURN INTO A MONKEY? 94 00:03:59,100 --> 00:04:01,133 ALL OF US ARE GONNA BE MONKEYS! 95 00:04:01,133 --> 00:04:04,667 SORRY, KELBO. WE FROWN ON RANDOM USES OF MAGIC. 96 00:04:04,667 --> 00:04:07,800 OK. LET'S TALK ABOUT IT. 97 00:04:07,800 --> 00:04:09,200 I-- 98 00:04:09,200 --> 00:04:10,600 GREAT CONVERSATION. 99 00:04:10,600 --> 00:04:13,367 ♪ WELL, YOU KNOW EVERYTHING'S GONNA BE A BREEZE ♪ 100 00:04:13,367 --> 00:04:15,200 ♪ THAT THE END WILL, NO DOUBT, JUSTIFY THE MEANS ♪ 101 00:04:15,200 --> 00:04:17,834 ♪ YOU CAN FIX ANY PROBLEM WITH THE SLIGHTEST OF EASE ♪ 102 00:04:17,834 --> 00:04:19,100 ♪ YES, PLEASE ♪ 103 00:04:19,100 --> 00:04:20,967 ♪ BUT YOU MIGHT FIND OUT IT'LL GO TO OUR HEAD ♪ 104 00:04:20,967 --> 00:04:23,033 ♪ WHEN YOU WRITE A REPORT ON A BOOK YOU NEVER READ ♪ 105 00:04:23,033 --> 00:04:25,600 ♪ WITH A SNAP OF YOUR FINGERS, YOU CAN MAKE YOUR BED ♪ 106 00:04:25,600 --> 00:04:27,500 ♪ THAT'S WHAT I SAID ♪ 107 00:04:27,500 --> 00:04:30,233 ♪ EVERYTHING IS NOT WHAT IT SEEMS ♪ 108 00:04:30,233 --> 00:04:32,200 ♪ WHEN YOU CAN GET ALL YOU WANTED ♪ 109 00:04:32,200 --> 00:04:34,200 ♪ IN YOUR WILDEST DREAMS ♪ 110 00:04:34,200 --> 00:04:37,734 ♪ YOU MIGHT RUN INTO TROUBLE IF YOU GO TO EXTREMES ♪ 111 00:04:37,734 --> 00:04:42,300 ♪ BECAUSE EVERYTHING IS NOT WHAT IT SEEMS ♪ 112 00:04:42,300 --> 00:04:45,567 ♪ EVERYTHING IS NOT WHAT IT SEEMS ♪ 113 00:04:45,567 --> 00:04:47,600 ♪ WHEN YOU CAN HAVE WHAT YOU WANT ♪ 114 00:04:47,600 --> 00:04:49,934 ♪ BY THE SIMPLEST OF MEANS ♪ 115 00:04:49,934 --> 00:04:53,133 ♪ BE CAREFUL NOT TO MESS WITH THE BALANCE OF THINGS ♪ 116 00:04:53,133 --> 00:04:59,567 ♪ BECAUSE EVERYTHING IS NOT WHAT IT SEEMS ♪ 117 00:05:06,367 --> 00:05:07,600 WHERE ARE THEY? 118 00:05:07,600 --> 00:05:10,000 YOU KNOW, THE BURGERS ARE ALMOST DONE. 119 00:05:10,000 --> 00:05:12,000 KELBO DOES THIS EVERY TIME! 120 00:05:12,000 --> 00:05:14,934 JERRY, THEY'RE OUT HAVING FUN WITH THEIR UNCLE. 121 00:05:14,934 --> 00:05:16,300 IT'S A GOOD THING. 122 00:05:16,300 --> 00:05:19,200 DO YOU REALLY TRUST HIM TO WATCH OUR CHILDREN? 123 00:05:19,200 --> 00:05:21,934 NO, BUT I TRUST OUR CHILDREN TO WATCH HIM. 124 00:05:23,667 --> 00:05:25,600 WE HAD SO MUCH FUN AT THE ZOO. 125 00:05:25,600 --> 00:05:26,667 OH, YEAH? 126 00:05:26,667 --> 00:05:28,500 I DIDN'T EVEN TURN THEM INTO MONKEYS 127 00:05:28,500 --> 00:05:30,400 JUST LIKE YOU ASKED. 128 00:05:30,400 --> 00:05:32,834 OH, GOOD. SO THEN THOSE AREN'T MONKEY TAILS. 129 00:05:32,834 --> 00:05:36,000 HEH HEH. CHOCOLATE? 130 00:05:36,000 --> 00:05:37,600 [GIBBERISH] 131 00:05:40,400 --> 00:05:42,400 MAN, I WANTED TO FIND OUT SOME STUFF 132 00:05:42,400 --> 00:05:43,667 FROM MY LEPRECHAUN ANSWER BLOWER. 133 00:05:43,667 --> 00:05:45,667 OH, HEY! LET ME ASK IT A QUESTION. 134 00:05:45,667 --> 00:05:48,133 UH, WHO IS MY SECRET ADMIRER? 135 00:05:48,133 --> 00:05:49,233 I'VE BEEN GETTING NOTES IN MY LOCKER 136 00:05:49,233 --> 00:05:51,734 EVERY WEDNESDAY FOR THE PAST 3 WEEKS. 137 00:05:55,000 --> 00:05:57,000 OH! YOU CAN'T ASK IT THAT. 138 00:05:57,000 --> 00:05:59,300 IT ONLY ANSWERS "YES, NO, OR I DON'T KNOW." 139 00:05:59,300 --> 00:06:02,834 OH. IS IT KATHY ANTINOKE? 140 00:06:06,834 --> 00:06:08,600 IS IT CORY MONTANO? 141 00:06:11,033 --> 00:06:12,400 THERE'S, LIKE, 300 GIRLS IN MY CLASS. 142 00:06:12,400 --> 00:06:14,133 THIS MIGHT TAKE A WHILE. 143 00:06:14,133 --> 00:06:16,233 OK, BUT JUST DON'T SUCK IN 144 00:06:16,233 --> 00:06:18,100 BECAUSE THE ANSWER JUICE TASTES NASTY. 145 00:06:20,200 --> 00:06:22,300 I'M GLAD YOU'RE BACK IN TIME TO WATCH 146 00:06:22,300 --> 00:06:23,567 THE BASKETBALL GAME, HONEY. 147 00:06:23,567 --> 00:06:26,367 OH, DAD, I DON'T WANT TO WATCH BASKETBALL. 148 00:06:26,367 --> 00:06:28,567 BASKETBALL? I GOT TICKETS TONIGHT 149 00:06:28,567 --> 00:06:31,500 FOR THE BASKETBALL GAME UP IN THE WIZARD LUXURY BOX. 150 00:06:31,500 --> 00:06:32,800 YOU WANT TO GO, ALEX? 151 00:06:32,800 --> 00:06:34,400 WELL, THE WIZARD LUXURY BOX? 152 00:06:34,400 --> 00:06:35,500 YEAH. THE WIZARD LUXURY BOX. 153 00:06:35,500 --> 00:06:37,367 YOU KNOW THE SCOREBOARD OVER CENTER COURT? 154 00:06:37,367 --> 00:06:39,834 THE WIZARD LUXURY BOX IS IN THAT. 155 00:06:39,834 --> 00:06:41,600 THAT SOUNDS AMAZING. I HAVE TO SEE IT. 156 00:06:41,600 --> 00:06:42,867 DAD, CAN I GO? 157 00:06:42,867 --> 00:06:44,734 WAIT. YOU DON'T WANT TO WATCH THE GAME WITH ME, 158 00:06:44,734 --> 00:06:46,100 BUT NOW THAT KELBO IS GONNA TAKE YOU 159 00:06:46,100 --> 00:06:49,967 TO SOME FANTASTIC WIZARD BOX, YOU WANT TO? 160 00:06:49,967 --> 00:06:51,934 WELL, BUT I DON'T THINK YOU'LL BE ABLE TO 161 00:06:51,934 --> 00:06:53,500 BECAUSE YOUR MOTHER HAS A LOT OF STUFF 162 00:06:53,500 --> 00:06:56,133 FOR YOU TO DO AROUND THE HOUSE. 163 00:06:56,133 --> 00:06:58,467 NO, I DON'T. 164 00:06:58,467 --> 00:06:59,967 OF COURSE, YOU SHOULD GO. 165 00:06:59,967 --> 00:07:02,000 SOUNDS LIKE A GREAT WAY TO SPEND SOME TIME WITH YOUR UNCLE. 166 00:07:02,000 --> 00:07:03,600 GREAT. WE GOT TO GET GOING 167 00:07:03,600 --> 00:07:05,600 BECAUSE WE GOT TO BEAT WIZARD TRAFFIC. 168 00:07:05,600 --> 00:07:07,200 OH, WAIT! LET ME GET MY SWEATER! 169 00:07:07,200 --> 00:07:08,900 YOU'RE A WIZARD. 170 00:07:08,900 --> 00:07:10,400 THANKS FOR REMINDING ME. 171 00:07:10,400 --> 00:07:13,367 CASHMERUS APPEARUS. 172 00:07:13,367 --> 00:07:16,300 OOH! SOFT. 173 00:07:16,300 --> 00:07:18,500 HEY! THAT'S MY SWEATER. 174 00:07:18,500 --> 00:07:21,200 OH, I'M SORRY, MOM. LET'S TALK ABOUT IT. 175 00:07:23,500 --> 00:07:25,200 GREAT CONVERSATION. 176 00:07:31,100 --> 00:07:32,700 SO WE'RE IN THE SCOREBOARD 177 00:07:32,700 --> 00:07:34,400 AND WE CAN SEE EVERYTHING AND EVERYBODY 178 00:07:34,400 --> 00:07:35,967 AND THEY CAN'T SEE US AT ALL? 179 00:07:35,967 --> 00:07:37,967 YEAH. IT'S THE BEAUTY OF THE WIZARD BOX 180 00:07:37,967 --> 00:07:39,600 EXCEPT IT'S GOT ONE DRAWBACK. 181 00:07:39,600 --> 00:07:41,000 P.A. announcer: TIMEOUT ON THE FLOOR. 182 00:07:41,000 --> 00:07:42,033 COVER YOUR EARS. 183 00:07:42,033 --> 00:07:44,367 [BUZZER] 184 00:07:44,367 --> 00:07:46,200 WE'RE TRYING TO GET THAT REMOVED. 185 00:07:46,200 --> 00:07:48,000 SO TELL ME MORE ABOUT THIS WHOLE 186 00:07:48,000 --> 00:07:49,967 SECRET ADMIRER THING WITH YOUR BROTHER. 187 00:07:49,967 --> 00:07:51,400 YOU'RE THE SECRET ADMIRER? 188 00:07:51,400 --> 00:07:53,200 YEAH. FOR THE LAST 3 WEEKS, 189 00:07:53,200 --> 00:07:54,600 I'VE BEEN DROPPING NOTES IN HIS LOCKER, 190 00:07:54,600 --> 00:07:56,233 SAYING THAT HE'S CUTE AND SWEET 191 00:07:56,233 --> 00:07:58,367 AND A BUNCH OF OTHER STUFF HE'S TOTALLY NOT. 192 00:07:58,367 --> 00:07:59,700 YOU WON'T TELL DAD, RIGHT? 193 00:07:59,700 --> 00:08:01,500 OF COURSE NOT! IT'S A CLASSIC GAG. 194 00:08:01,500 --> 00:08:02,900 I GOT A FINISH FOR YOU. 195 00:08:02,900 --> 00:08:04,033 HERE'S WHAT YOU DO. 196 00:08:04,033 --> 00:08:05,667 YOU GET YOURSELF A GENIE, ALL RIGHT, 197 00:08:05,667 --> 00:08:07,934 DRESS YOUR GENIE UP LIKE A SECRET ADMIRER. 198 00:08:07,934 --> 00:08:10,000 THE MINUTE HE SPOTS THE GENIE, 199 00:08:10,000 --> 00:08:11,567 YOU CAPTURE HIS SOUL, 200 00:08:11,567 --> 00:08:13,200 PUT IT IN A LAMP. 201 00:08:13,200 --> 00:08:15,667 HA HA HA! I LOVE THAT ONE! 202 00:08:15,667 --> 00:08:17,100 I WASN'T GONNA GO THAT FAR. 203 00:08:17,100 --> 00:08:19,200 WELL, YOU'RE YOUNG. YOU GOT A LOT TO LEARN. 204 00:08:19,200 --> 00:08:21,033 AND I BET YOU COULD TEACH ME A LOT. 205 00:08:21,033 --> 00:08:22,133 OF COURSE I COULD. 206 00:08:22,133 --> 00:08:23,600 REALLY? YEAH. 207 00:08:23,600 --> 00:08:25,734 YOU HAVE SO MUCH MORE FUN WITH MAGIC THAN DAD DOES. 208 00:08:25,734 --> 00:08:27,300 OK. HERE'S A GOOD ONE. 209 00:08:27,300 --> 00:08:29,300 HOLD YOUR HEAD LIKE THIS. 210 00:08:29,300 --> 00:08:32,100 CRANIUM REVOLVUS. 211 00:08:35,600 --> 00:08:37,133 [GROANING] 212 00:08:37,133 --> 00:08:39,667 I LOVE THAT! I CAN'T WAIT FOR OUR NEXT SCHOOL ASSEMBLY! 213 00:08:39,667 --> 00:08:40,834 P.A. announcer: AND THAT'S THE HALF! 214 00:08:40,834 --> 00:08:41,834 COVER YOUR EARS. 215 00:08:41,834 --> 00:08:43,800 [BUZZER] 216 00:08:43,800 --> 00:08:46,000 YOU'RE THE BEST, UNCLE KELBO! 217 00:08:50,500 --> 00:08:52,600 HEY. WHAT YOU GOT THERE? 218 00:08:52,600 --> 00:08:54,100 I GOT ANOTHER NOTE FROM MY SECRET ADMIRER. 219 00:08:54,100 --> 00:08:55,567 THEY'RE COMING EVERY DAY NOW. 220 00:08:55,567 --> 00:08:56,800 WOW! THAT'S EXCITING. 221 00:08:56,800 --> 00:08:58,233 DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHO IT MIGHT BE? 222 00:08:58,233 --> 00:09:00,233 NO, BUT SHE'S PROBABLY PRETTY CUTE. 223 00:09:00,233 --> 00:09:02,367 YOU SEE, SHE DOTS HER Is WITH HEARTS, 224 00:09:02,367 --> 00:09:05,200 AND THAT ALWAYS SAYS CUTE! HA HA! 225 00:09:05,200 --> 00:09:07,767 OOH! AND PERFUME. 226 00:09:07,767 --> 00:09:10,967 OH! I CAN'T EVEN SMELL IT BECAUSE OF MY ALLERGIES. 227 00:09:10,967 --> 00:09:12,233 YEP. YOU'RE SOMEONE'S DREAM, 228 00:09:12,233 --> 00:09:15,767 SOMEONE WITHOUT PETS, GRASS, OR COMMON HOUSE DUST. 229 00:09:15,767 --> 00:09:18,300 WELL, IT'S TOO BAD YOU DON'T KNOW WHO SHE IS. 230 00:09:18,300 --> 00:09:20,500 HEY. I GOT A GREAT PLAN TO FIGURE IT OUT. 231 00:09:20,500 --> 00:09:22,300 I'M GONNA--YOU DON'T WANT TO HEAR 232 00:09:22,300 --> 00:09:23,734 ABOUT MY STUPID PLAN, DO YOU? 233 00:09:23,734 --> 00:09:25,667 OH, NO, NO, NO. I WANT TO HEAR ALL ABOUT YOUR STUPID PLAN. 234 00:09:25,667 --> 00:09:27,667 OK! 235 00:09:27,667 --> 00:09:29,300 I'M GONNA HIDE IN THIS TRASHCAN 236 00:09:29,300 --> 00:09:31,367 AND STAKE OUT MY LOCKER. 237 00:09:31,367 --> 00:09:32,700 BRILLIANT! YEP! 238 00:09:32,700 --> 00:09:34,100 AND MAX IS GONNA HELP ME. 239 00:09:34,100 --> 00:09:35,400 HE'S GONNA BE YOUR LOOKOUT? 240 00:09:35,400 --> 00:09:37,100 NO. HE'S GONNA STOP THE WRESTLING TEAM 241 00:09:37,100 --> 00:09:38,734 FROM SHOVING EUGENE TRUBNIK 242 00:09:38,734 --> 00:09:41,000 INTO THE TRASHCAN LIKE THEY DO EVERY DAY AT 3:00. 243 00:09:41,000 --> 00:09:42,300 I THOUGHT EUGENE WAS HOME-SCHOOLED. 244 00:09:42,300 --> 00:09:44,467 HE IS! THEY GO HOME AND GET HIM. 245 00:09:50,467 --> 00:09:51,867 WHERE IS SHE? 246 00:09:51,867 --> 00:09:54,133 I DON'T WANT TO TEACH THE MAGIC SAFETY COURSE TWICE. 247 00:09:54,133 --> 00:09:56,033 WE DON'T WANT TO HEAR IT ONCE. 248 00:09:58,200 --> 00:10:02,700 SORRY WE'RE LATE, BUT YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I LOVE THE OLD WEST. 249 00:10:02,700 --> 00:10:04,800 IT WAS GREAT. WE WENT ON THE CATTLE DRIVE, 250 00:10:04,800 --> 00:10:06,567 AND WE TOOK TURNS BRANDING. 251 00:10:06,567 --> 00:10:08,600 WANT TO SEE MINE? 252 00:10:08,600 --> 00:10:11,300 JUST KIDDING! HA HA HA! 253 00:10:11,300 --> 00:10:12,934 I'M GONNA GET ME A SARSAPARILLA 254 00:10:12,934 --> 00:10:15,834 AND A NICE, HOT BATH. 255 00:10:15,834 --> 00:10:18,233 PARTNER, I'D LOVE ME A SARSAPARILLA, 256 00:10:18,233 --> 00:10:20,233 WHATEVER THAT IS. I HOPE IT'S ROOT BEER. 257 00:10:20,233 --> 00:10:21,934 OH, NO, NO, NO. NO, NO, NO. 258 00:10:21,934 --> 00:10:23,100 YOU WERE LATE, YOUNG LADY. 259 00:10:23,100 --> 00:10:24,400 WE'VE ALL BEEN WAITING. 260 00:10:24,400 --> 00:10:26,500 AND WE'RE ABOUT TO START THE MAGIC SAFETY LESSON. 261 00:10:26,500 --> 00:10:28,667 DID YOU GUYS KNOW MOST WIZARD ACCIDENTS 262 00:10:28,667 --> 00:10:30,300 HAPPEN WITHIN A MILE OF THE HOME? 263 00:10:30,300 --> 00:10:32,100 THAT'S BECAUSE SOME PEOPLE HAVE BROTHERS, 264 00:10:32,100 --> 00:10:35,100 AND THEY'RE NOT ACCIDENTS. 265 00:10:35,100 --> 00:10:37,000 DADDY, IT'S KIND OF OK THAT I'M LATE 266 00:10:37,000 --> 00:10:39,100 BECAUSE UNCLE KELBO'S BEEN TEACHING ME MAGIC FOR THE LAST FEW DAYS. 267 00:10:39,100 --> 00:10:41,000 IN FACT, HE AND I WERE TALKING, 268 00:10:41,000 --> 00:10:43,667 AND HE SAID THAT HE COULD BE MY WIZARD TRAINER INSTEAD OF YOU. 269 00:10:43,667 --> 00:10:45,400 HE DID?! I DID?! 270 00:10:45,400 --> 00:10:46,400 YOU DID! 271 00:10:46,400 --> 00:10:47,600 HOLD ON. 272 00:10:54,900 --> 00:10:56,500 I DID?! 273 00:11:00,100 --> 00:11:01,700 KELBO, WAS THIS YOUR IDEA? 274 00:11:01,700 --> 00:11:04,867 NO. USUALLY WHEN A GUY GOES TO GET A GLASS 275 00:11:04,867 --> 00:11:07,867 AND DOES A SPIT TAKE, IT SAYS, "SURPRISE." 276 00:11:08,967 --> 00:11:11,734 BUT AT THE BASKETBALL GAME, YOU SAID YOU WOULD TEACH ME. 277 00:11:11,734 --> 00:11:15,500 YEAH, BUT I WAS TALKING MORE ABOUT, LIKE, PRANKS AND THINGS LIKE THAT. 278 00:11:15,500 --> 00:11:20,033 OH. LIKE DAD HAS THOSE BIRTHDAY CANDLES THAT NEVER BLOW OUT. 279 00:11:20,033 --> 00:11:22,867 NO. MORE LIKE 50 WIZARDS' HEADS 280 00:11:22,867 --> 00:11:24,500 SPINNING COMPLETELY AROUND THEIR BODIES. 281 00:11:24,500 --> 00:11:28,233 OH, THAT'S WAY BETTER THAN THE BURNING CANDLES THING. 282 00:11:28,233 --> 00:11:30,000 BUT YOU GUYS LOVE THE CANDLES 283 00:11:30,000 --> 00:11:31,767 WITH THE FFFF 284 00:11:31,767 --> 00:11:33,033 AND THE FFFZZZ 285 00:11:33,033 --> 00:11:36,000 AND THE FFFOOO! 286 00:11:36,000 --> 00:11:39,000 LOOK. I'M HONORED THAT YOU WANT ME TO BE YOUR TEACHER, 287 00:11:39,000 --> 00:11:40,600 BUT THAT'S YOUR DAD'S JOB. 288 00:11:40,600 --> 00:11:42,467 DAD'S GREAT WITH JUSTIN AND MAX, 289 00:11:42,467 --> 00:11:45,600 BUT I DON'T THINK I'M REACHING MY FULL POTENTIAL WITH HIM. 290 00:11:45,600 --> 00:11:47,400 WELL, I DON'T WANT TO STAND IN THE WAY 291 00:11:47,400 --> 00:11:48,967 OF YOUR FULL POTENTIAL. 292 00:11:48,967 --> 00:11:50,667 MAYBE KELBO SHOULD TEACH YOU. 293 00:11:50,667 --> 00:11:51,934 MAYBE YOU'LL ACTUALLY SHOW UP ON TIME 294 00:11:51,934 --> 00:11:53,400 FOR HIS LESSONS. 295 00:11:53,400 --> 00:11:55,100 I WILL, DAD, BECAUSE YOU KNOW WHAT I WAS THINKING 296 00:11:55,100 --> 00:11:58,033 IS THAT I LEARN MORE BY DOING THAN I DO BY LEARNING. 297 00:11:58,033 --> 00:11:59,467 THEN IT'S DONE! 298 00:12:00,867 --> 00:12:02,133 Justin: WAIT A MINUTE. 299 00:12:02,133 --> 00:12:03,567 WE GET TO PICK OUR WIZARD TEACHERS? 300 00:12:03,567 --> 00:12:05,200 OH! I PICK... 301 00:12:05,200 --> 00:12:06,467 DAD. 302 00:12:13,367 --> 00:12:16,667 EXCUSE US. WE GOT A RESERVATION FOR THIS GARBAGE CAN. 303 00:12:16,667 --> 00:12:19,400 THIS ONE'S FULL. 304 00:12:19,400 --> 00:12:21,600 THERE'S A STINKIER ONE UPSTAIRS. 305 00:12:23,133 --> 00:12:25,000 SEE YOU TOMORROW AT 3:00, EUGENE. 306 00:12:30,100 --> 00:12:32,100 I DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH LONGER I CAN HOLD OUT. 307 00:12:32,100 --> 00:12:33,600 I'M THE ONE IN THE TRASHCAN. 308 00:12:33,600 --> 00:12:34,967 MY LEG WAS ASLEEP, WOKE UP, 309 00:12:34,967 --> 00:12:37,567 AND NOW IT'S ASLEEP AGAIN. 310 00:12:37,567 --> 00:12:40,400 AND I'M CLAUSTROPHOBIC! 311 00:12:40,400 --> 00:12:42,467 SOMEONE'S COMING! I'LL ACT NATURAL. 312 00:12:42,467 --> 00:12:44,033 OH, YEAH. 313 00:12:44,033 --> 00:12:46,200 YEP. STANDING HERE, BEING NATURAL, 314 00:12:46,200 --> 00:12:47,467 WHISTLING. 315 00:12:47,467 --> 00:12:49,133 [SPUTTERS] 316 00:12:55,734 --> 00:12:57,967 OH, MY GOSH! 317 00:12:57,967 --> 00:13:00,233 THE LUNCH LADY LOVES YOU. 318 00:13:00,233 --> 00:13:01,800 MAKES SENSE. 319 00:13:01,800 --> 00:13:03,200 MY MILK'S ALWAYS A LITTLE BIT COLDER 320 00:13:03,200 --> 00:13:04,667 THAN EVERYONE ELSE'S. 321 00:13:04,667 --> 00:13:05,767 WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO? 322 00:13:05,767 --> 00:13:06,867 I'M GONNA WRITE HER A LETTER 323 00:13:06,867 --> 00:13:08,200 AND TELL HER OF COURSE I'M FLATTERED 324 00:13:08,200 --> 00:13:11,200 AND IF I WAS 20 TO 30 YEARS OLDER AND OUT OF OPTIONS, 325 00:13:11,200 --> 00:13:14,767 MAYBE OUR LOVE COULD FLOURISH. 326 00:13:14,767 --> 00:13:17,600 OK. LET HER DOWN EASY. 327 00:13:17,600 --> 00:13:18,900 YOU DON'T WANT WARM MILK. 328 00:13:18,900 --> 00:13:20,500 UH-HUH. 329 00:13:20,500 --> 00:13:22,367 HEY, THANKS FOR DOING THAT FOR ME, DORIS. 330 00:13:22,367 --> 00:13:24,834 HERE'S THE LEFT-HANDED MASHED POTATO SCOOPER YOU WANTED. 331 00:13:24,834 --> 00:13:26,500 THANKS. A LOT OF PEOPLE THINK 332 00:13:26,500 --> 00:13:28,400 THEY'RE THE SAME AS AN ICE CREAM SCOOPER. 333 00:13:28,400 --> 00:13:33,800 THOSE PEOPLE WOULD BE WRONG. 334 00:13:33,800 --> 00:13:35,967 THAT WAS TOTALLY AN ICE CREAM SCOOPER. 335 00:13:41,400 --> 00:13:43,800 SO THAT'S HOW YOU DISAPPEAR AND REAPPEAR 336 00:13:43,800 --> 00:13:44,834 10 FEET AWAY. 337 00:13:44,834 --> 00:13:46,000 PRETTY FUN, HUH? 338 00:13:46,000 --> 00:13:48,367 THAT'S ABOUT AS MAGICAL AS WALKING. 339 00:13:52,467 --> 00:13:53,500 SEE? WHAT DID I TELL YOU? 340 00:13:53,500 --> 00:13:55,100 NOT AS MUCH FUN AS POOFING IN. 341 00:13:55,100 --> 00:13:56,300 HEY, DAD! HEY, ALEX. 342 00:13:56,300 --> 00:13:57,834 YOU MISSED A GOOD ONE TODAY. 343 00:13:57,834 --> 00:14:00,734 WE DISAPPEARED AND THEN REAPPEARED 10 FEET AWAY. 344 00:14:00,734 --> 00:14:02,200 WASN'T IT FUN, GUYS? 345 00:14:02,200 --> 00:14:03,400 YEAH. A LITTLE MORE EXCITING 346 00:14:03,400 --> 00:14:07,100 THAN THAT RIPENING FRUIT SPELL YOU TAUGHT US. 347 00:14:07,100 --> 00:14:09,667 OK. WELL, HAVE A GOOD LESSON. 348 00:14:09,667 --> 00:14:11,300 THE LAIR IS YOURS, KELBO. 349 00:14:11,300 --> 00:14:13,300 PLEASE LEAVE IT HOW YOU FOUND IT. 350 00:14:13,300 --> 00:14:15,200 COME ON, GUYS. 351 00:14:15,200 --> 00:14:17,500 OOH! HEY, MAX. 352 00:14:17,500 --> 00:14:20,033 DOES ANYBODY WANT SOME SALTED NUTS? 353 00:14:20,033 --> 00:14:21,400 SURE, DAD. 354 00:14:23,600 --> 00:14:26,000 WHOA! SNAKES OF ALL DIFFERENT COLORS! 355 00:14:26,000 --> 00:14:27,200 IT WAS-- 356 00:14:30,867 --> 00:14:33,600 SO WHAT'S OUR LESSON GONNA BE? 357 00:14:33,600 --> 00:14:35,300 OH. I THOUGHT WE'D TAKE A NAP FIRST. 358 00:14:35,300 --> 00:14:38,734 UH, WELL, I'LL TELL YOU WHAT IT'S NOT GONNA BE, 359 00:14:38,734 --> 00:14:40,600 AND THAT'S FRUIT RIPENING 360 00:14:40,600 --> 00:14:41,834 BECAUSE IT'S EASY. 361 00:14:41,834 --> 00:14:43,567 ALL YOU DO IS YOU BUY THE FRUIT, 362 00:14:43,567 --> 00:14:46,367 YOU GO INTO THE FUTURE, THE FRUIT'S RIPE, YOU EAT IT. 363 00:14:46,367 --> 00:14:47,567 YOU'RE GONNA TEACH ME ABOUT TIME TRAVEL? 364 00:14:47,567 --> 00:14:50,567 I'VE ALWAYS WANTED TO LEARN THAT. 365 00:14:50,567 --> 00:14:54,400 OH, LOOK! THE WIZARD MAIL'S HERE! 366 00:14:54,400 --> 00:14:57,200 UNCLE KELBO, CAN WE PLEASE FOCUS ON THE LESSON? 367 00:14:57,200 --> 00:15:01,500 LOOK. WE'LL READ IT. WE'LL GO BACK IN TIME TO BEFORE WE READ IT, 368 00:15:01,500 --> 00:15:04,300 AND IT WILL BE LIKE WE HAVEN'T EVEN READ IT. 369 00:15:04,300 --> 00:15:05,934 A SEA CHIMP SAMPLE? 370 00:15:05,934 --> 00:15:07,567 WE USED TO GET THESE ALL THE TIME WHEN WE WERE LITTLE. 371 00:15:07,567 --> 00:15:08,967 THEY'RE JUST PETS YOU PUT IN WATER, 372 00:15:08,967 --> 00:15:10,867 AND YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE TO FEED THEM OR PLAY WITH THEM. 373 00:15:10,867 --> 00:15:12,667 THEY'RE GREAT. THEY DIE WAY BEFORE 374 00:15:12,667 --> 00:15:14,734 YOUR MOM MAKES YOU THROW OUT THE SMELLY WATER. 375 00:15:14,734 --> 00:15:16,100 OPEN THEM UP. COME ON! 376 00:15:16,100 --> 00:15:17,767 I DON'T KNOW. THESE AREN'T REGULAR SEA CHIMPS. 377 00:15:17,767 --> 00:15:19,100 THEY CAME IN THE WIZARD MAIL, 378 00:15:19,100 --> 00:15:20,233 AND DAD DOESN'T LIKE US TO OPEN 379 00:15:20,233 --> 00:15:21,400 THE WIZARD MAIL WITHOUT HIM 380 00:15:21,400 --> 00:15:22,767 BECAUSE SOME OF THE STUFF CAN BE DANGEROUS. 381 00:15:22,767 --> 00:15:24,967 OK. I UNDERSTAND, BUT YOUR DAD'S NOT YOUR TEACHER. 382 00:15:24,967 --> 00:15:27,200 I AM, AND WHATEVER GOES WRONG, 383 00:15:27,200 --> 00:15:29,400 WE CAN FIX WITH MAGIC. 384 00:15:29,400 --> 00:15:34,200 ALL RIGHT. DON'T YOU NEED WATER FOR SEA CHIMPS? 385 00:15:34,200 --> 00:15:39,000 APPARENTLY NOT. WHAT--WHAT-- 386 00:15:39,000 --> 00:15:40,200 THAT'S NOT GONNA WORK. 387 00:15:40,200 --> 00:15:42,033 FIX IT WITH MAGIC! 388 00:15:42,033 --> 00:15:45,700 MM. OK, OK, OK. ALL RIGHT. I GOT IT. 389 00:15:45,700 --> 00:15:49,867 ZEM BA LEM BUM BUM BUM BA DE BUM BA DE BUM BA DE WHEE! 390 00:15:52,100 --> 00:15:55,600 OK. THAT'S WHAT I USE IN THE SHOWER AT CHEAP MOTELS. 391 00:15:55,600 --> 00:15:58,400 SORRY. USE ANOTHER ONE. 392 00:15:58,400 --> 00:16:00,767 I CAN'T! I'M PANICKING! 393 00:16:02,767 --> 00:16:05,233 GUESS WHO I AM. 394 00:16:05,233 --> 00:16:07,400 AHEM. 395 00:16:07,400 --> 00:16:09,000 I'M THE LUNCH LADY. 396 00:16:09,000 --> 00:16:11,133 I'M IN LOVE WITH JUSTIN. 397 00:16:11,133 --> 00:16:15,100 GIVE ME A KISS, DOLL FACE. MM. MM. 398 00:16:17,500 --> 00:16:19,500 HEY. WHY IS COACH GUNDERSON HERE, 399 00:16:19,500 --> 00:16:21,734 AND WHY DOES HE LOOK SO MAD? 400 00:16:24,600 --> 00:16:26,834 WHICH ONE OF YOU IS JUSTIN RUSSO? 401 00:16:30,100 --> 00:16:33,033 I THINK IT'S YOU! 402 00:16:33,033 --> 00:16:34,967 YOU DON'T SHOWER AFTER GYM 403 00:16:34,967 --> 00:16:36,233 BECAUSE YOU DON'T SWEAT 404 00:16:36,233 --> 00:16:38,667 BECAUSE YOU WALK THE MILE! 405 00:16:38,667 --> 00:16:41,033 HEH. HEY, COACH. 406 00:16:41,033 --> 00:16:43,467 WHAT ARE YOU DOING WRITING LOVE LETTERS 407 00:16:43,467 --> 00:16:45,900 TO MY GIRLFRIEND THE LUNCH LADY? 408 00:16:48,200 --> 00:16:50,834 UH, SHE WAS PUTTING LETTERS IN MY LOCKER, 409 00:16:50,834 --> 00:16:52,967 AND I WAS JUST TRYING TO LET HER DOWN GENTLY. 410 00:16:52,967 --> 00:16:55,300 UH, EXCUSE ME. WHAT'S GOING ON HERE? 411 00:16:55,300 --> 00:16:57,567 YOUR SON IS TRYING TO TELL ME 412 00:16:57,567 --> 00:16:58,867 THAT HE'S GETTING LOVE LETTERS 413 00:16:58,867 --> 00:17:02,567 FROM MY GIRLFRIEND, THE LUNCH LADY! 414 00:17:02,567 --> 00:17:04,834 THE LUNCH LADY? 415 00:17:04,834 --> 00:17:06,934 MAY I SEE ONE OF THESE NOTES? 416 00:17:06,934 --> 00:17:08,200 I HAVE ONE. 417 00:17:11,300 --> 00:17:14,600 "I LOVE YOUR LIGHTSABER NIGHTLIGHT"? 418 00:17:16,100 --> 00:17:17,800 HOW WOULD THE LUNCH LADY KNOW 419 00:17:17,800 --> 00:17:20,400 YOU HAVE A LIGHTSABER NIGHTLIGHT? 420 00:17:20,400 --> 00:17:23,834 ALEX! 421 00:17:23,834 --> 00:17:26,000 ALEX IS MY 14-YEAR-OLD DAUGHTER, 422 00:17:26,000 --> 00:17:27,900 AND SHE KIND OF TORMENTS HIM. 423 00:17:27,900 --> 00:17:30,867 WELL, REALLY ALL OF US. 424 00:17:30,867 --> 00:17:32,567 I GET IT. 425 00:17:32,567 --> 00:17:35,467 YOU STILL SLEEP WITH A NIGHTLIGHT? 426 00:17:35,467 --> 00:17:40,500 GOOD. THE DARK CAN BE VERY, VERY SCARY. 427 00:17:41,967 --> 00:17:44,867 KEEP WALKING THE MILE, 428 00:17:44,867 --> 00:17:47,100 AND SORRY I BARKED AT YOU. 429 00:17:47,100 --> 00:17:49,834 LUNCH LADY SAYS I GET PRETTY JEALOUS. HEH. 430 00:17:53,133 --> 00:17:54,900 WAIIGH! 431 00:17:54,900 --> 00:17:56,667 OHH! OHH! 432 00:17:56,667 --> 00:17:58,900 OH, GOSH! 433 00:17:58,900 --> 00:18:00,066 HONEY, ARE YOU ALL RIGHT? 434 00:18:00,066 --> 00:18:02,867 YEAH. I DON'T KNOW WHAT HAPPENED 435 00:18:02,867 --> 00:18:04,834 I KNOW WHAT HAPPENED. THERE'S WATER COMING OUT OF THE LAIR. 436 00:18:04,834 --> 00:18:07,033 WHO--WHO'S IN THE LAIR? 437 00:18:07,033 --> 00:18:09,100 ALEX AND KELBO! THEY'RE DOING THEIR LESSON IN THERE. 438 00:18:09,100 --> 00:18:10,900 OK. SOMEBODY'S GOT TO GET INTO THE LAIR. 439 00:18:10,900 --> 00:18:12,367 WE DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH WATER IS IN THERE. 440 00:18:12,367 --> 00:18:14,400 IF WE OPEN IT, IT COULD FLOOD THE WHOLE RESTAURANT. 441 00:18:14,400 --> 00:18:16,000 I KNOW. YOU REMEMBER THE SPELL FROM TODAY, 442 00:18:16,000 --> 00:18:17,600 TRANSPORTING 10 FEET? 443 00:18:17,600 --> 00:18:19,200 COME ON! I'M ON IT! 444 00:18:19,200 --> 00:18:24,233 OH! WAIT, WAIT! I'LL BE RIGHT BACK. 445 00:18:24,233 --> 00:18:27,000 OK, OK. I'M READY. BETTER SAFE THAN SORRY. 446 00:18:27,000 --> 00:18:29,400 JUSTIN GET ME IN THERE. 447 00:18:29,400 --> 00:18:31,500 THRIVITRUS MOVITRUS! 448 00:18:32,834 --> 00:18:35,133 HEY. WHY CAN I BREATHE UNDERWATER? 449 00:18:35,133 --> 00:18:38,867 IT'S DUE TO THE FACT THAT WE'RE SEA CHIMPS. 450 00:18:38,867 --> 00:18:41,600 OH. DO SOMETHING! 451 00:18:41,600 --> 00:18:42,700 HA! RELAX. I'VE BEEN IN WAY 452 00:18:42,700 --> 00:18:44,000 WORSE SITUATIONS THAN THIS. 453 00:18:44,000 --> 00:18:47,500 IMAGINE THE EXACT SAME THING EXCEPT HOT LAVA. 454 00:18:47,500 --> 00:18:49,400 WHY WERE YOU IN HOT LAVA? 455 00:18:49,400 --> 00:18:52,000 SUFFICE IT TO SAY, I DON'T KNOW HOW TO MAKE HOT COFFEE. 456 00:18:52,000 --> 00:18:56,000 Jerry: YOU OPENED THE MAGIC SEA CHIMP PACKET, DIDN'T YOU? 457 00:18:56,000 --> 00:18:58,033 A LITTLE. 458 00:18:58,033 --> 00:18:59,600 I KNOW A SPELL THAT WILL FIX THIS. 459 00:18:59,600 --> 00:19:02,133 ALEX, REPEAT AFTER ME. 460 00:19:02,133 --> 00:19:04,133 I'M A BIG KNUCKLEHEAD. 461 00:19:04,133 --> 00:19:06,100 I'M A BIG KNUCKLEHEAD. 462 00:19:06,100 --> 00:19:07,967 WAIT A SECOND. THAT'S NOT A SPELL. 463 00:19:07,967 --> 00:19:11,033 NO. I KNOW. I JUST WANTED TO HEAR YOU ADMIT IT. 464 00:19:11,033 --> 00:19:13,233 HEY. IF ANYONE HERE'S A BIG KNUCKLEHEAD, 465 00:19:13,233 --> 00:19:15,867 IT'S THIS SEA CHIMP! 466 00:19:15,867 --> 00:19:19,000 GEE. WHO KNOWS A SPELL THAT WILL GET US OUT OF THIS MESS? 467 00:19:19,000 --> 00:19:21,200 ANYONE? ANYONE? 468 00:19:21,200 --> 00:19:23,567 OH, WAIT. I DO! 469 00:19:23,567 --> 00:19:26,500 ALL RIGHT. ALEX, SAY THIS. 470 00:19:26,500 --> 00:19:30,100 DEHYDRATUS LOUGANIS APUS ESCAPUS! 471 00:19:30,100 --> 00:19:33,367 DEHYDRATUS LOUGANIS APUS ESCAPUS! 472 00:19:36,867 --> 00:19:38,100 I JUST DON'T GET IT. 473 00:19:38,100 --> 00:19:39,734 KELBO SAID THAT HE COULD FIX IT, 474 00:19:39,734 --> 00:19:41,567 BUT HE COULDN'T, AND DAD COULD, 475 00:19:41,567 --> 00:19:43,367 BUT DAD'S NOT EVEN THE WIZARD ANYMORE. 476 00:19:43,367 --> 00:19:45,934 WELL, YOUR DAD WAS ALWAYS A MUCH BETTER WIZARD THAN I WAS. 477 00:19:45,934 --> 00:19:48,033 THAT CAN'T BE TRUE. ONLY ONE WIZARD IN EACH FAMILY 478 00:19:48,033 --> 00:19:49,400 CAN KEEP THEIR POWERS. 479 00:19:49,400 --> 00:19:50,500 IF DAD WAS THE BETTER WIZARD, 480 00:19:50,500 --> 00:19:51,600 HE'D KEEP HIS POWERS. 481 00:19:51,600 --> 00:19:53,734 YOU NEVER TOLD THEM, HUH? 482 00:19:53,734 --> 00:19:55,600 TOLD US WHAT? 483 00:19:55,600 --> 00:19:58,367 HONEY, I THINK THEY'RE OLD ENOUGH. 484 00:19:58,367 --> 00:20:00,867 WE'RE ALL GETTING GO-KARTS? 485 00:20:02,967 --> 00:20:04,100 NO. 486 00:20:07,500 --> 00:20:09,900 WHEN KELBO AND YOUR FATHER COMPETED TO SEE 487 00:20:09,900 --> 00:20:12,000 WHO'D KEEP THEIR WIZARD POWERS, 488 00:20:12,000 --> 00:20:15,400 IT WAS YOUR DAD WHO WON THE CONTEST. 489 00:20:15,400 --> 00:20:16,667 WHAT?! 490 00:20:16,667 --> 00:20:19,133 BUT WIZARDS CAN'T MARRY NONWIZARDS, 491 00:20:19,133 --> 00:20:21,867 SO YOUR DAD GAVE KELBO HIS POWERS 492 00:20:21,867 --> 00:20:23,834 SO THAT HE COULD MARRY ME. 493 00:20:27,667 --> 00:20:29,133 I THINK THAT'S THE SWEETEST THING 494 00:20:29,133 --> 00:20:30,800 I'VE EVER HEARD IN MY LIFE. 495 00:20:30,800 --> 00:20:33,233 GIVE YOUR POWERS UP FOR A GIRL? WHAT?! 496 00:20:33,233 --> 00:20:36,200 YEAH, RIGHT! HA HA HA! 497 00:20:36,200 --> 00:20:38,100 HA HA HA! HA HA! 498 00:20:38,100 --> 00:20:39,900 UGH. 499 00:20:39,900 --> 00:20:42,000 YOU GUYS, IF DAD HADN'T GIVEN UP HIS POWERS, 500 00:20:42,000 --> 00:20:43,600 NONE OF US WOULD BE HERE. 501 00:20:43,600 --> 00:20:45,600 YEAH. I MADE THE RIGHT DECISION THEN, 502 00:20:45,600 --> 00:20:47,233 AND I STAND BY IT. 503 00:20:47,233 --> 00:20:48,900 AND I SHOULD HAVE STOOD BY YOU, DAD. 504 00:20:48,900 --> 00:20:50,200 WILL YOU STILL BE MY WIZARD TEACHER? 505 00:20:50,200 --> 00:20:52,834 PLEASE! I BEG OF YOU, OK? 506 00:20:52,834 --> 00:20:54,600 TAKE HER ON. YOU KNOW ME. 507 00:20:54,600 --> 00:20:56,800 I CAN'T HANDLE IT. I GET DISTRACTED, 508 00:20:56,800 --> 00:20:58,200 AND THEN I GET CARELESS, 509 00:20:58,200 --> 00:21:01,667 AND THEN--THIS TOWEL IS SO SOFT. 510 00:21:05,300 --> 00:21:08,133 OH, AND DISTRACTED! YOU KNOW I GET DISTRACTED! 511 00:21:08,133 --> 00:21:12,100 WE GET IT. HONEY HONEY, I'LL BE YOUR TEACHER. 512 00:21:12,100 --> 00:21:14,100 BUT YOU'RE STILL MY FUN UNCLE KELBO. 513 00:21:14,100 --> 00:21:16,200 I MEAN, WHO ELSE GETS TO SAY THAT THEY WERE A SEA CHIMP 514 00:21:16,200 --> 00:21:17,734 EVEN FOR A LITTLE WHILE? 515 00:21:17,734 --> 00:21:21,500 ACTUALLY, EVERYONE I KNOW. 516 00:21:21,500 --> 00:21:24,000 HA! I'VE MADE THEM ALL OPEN UP THAT SAME PACKET 517 00:21:24,000 --> 00:21:27,700 BECAUSE I JUST LOVE THE PRETTY COLORS ON THE OUTSIDE. 518 00:21:27,700 --> 00:21:28,834 [WATCH BEEPS] 519 00:21:28,834 --> 00:21:30,500 WHOA! THE BASKETBALL GAME IS ON! 520 00:21:30,500 --> 00:21:32,100 OH, CAN I WATCH IT WITH YOU? 521 00:21:32,100 --> 00:21:33,967 YES. I'D LOVE THAT, HONEY. 522 00:21:33,967 --> 00:21:35,800 WAIT, WAIT, WAIT. I'VE GOT AN IDEA. 523 00:21:35,800 --> 00:21:37,100 WE CAN ALL WATCH IT. 524 00:21:37,100 --> 00:21:39,100 [GIBBERISH] 525 00:21:44,934 --> 00:21:46,300 HEY, GUYS! WANT TO SEE SOMETHING COOL? 526 00:21:46,300 --> 00:21:48,100 HOLD YOUR HEADS LIKE THIS. 527 00:21:48,100 --> 00:21:49,400 WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? 528 00:21:49,400 --> 00:21:51,300 CRANIUM REVOLVUS. 529 00:21:54,600 --> 00:21:57,400 OH! AAH! THIS IS BONK--AAH! 530 00:22:01,934 --> 00:22:05,467 BEEP BEEP BOOP BOOP BOOP BOOP BOOP BEEP BOO. 531 00:22:05,467 --> 00:22:08,300 OK. YOU REMEMBER WHAT TO SAY, RIGHT? 532 00:22:08,300 --> 00:22:10,200 YEAH. EXCUSE ME. I WAS JUST CHECKING 533 00:22:10,200 --> 00:22:12,300 TO SEE IF YOUR REFRIGERATOR'S RUNNING. 534 00:22:12,300 --> 00:22:16,000 AS A MATTER OF FACT, MY REFRIGERATOR IS BROKEN. 535 00:22:16,000 --> 00:22:17,100 IT'S NOT RUNNING. 536 00:22:17,100 --> 00:22:18,400 WHAT DO I DO IF IT'S NOT RUNNING? 537 00:22:18,400 --> 00:22:20,200 SHE'S ONTO US! RUN!